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Mollusk PR Work - Mega Motors

The Client Problem: Mega Motors sales fall as Americans view this legacy car manufacturer as antiquated, poorly managed, and headed for bankruptcy.

The Mollusk Solution: While previous public relation firms had attempted to reshape Mega Motors image through advertising and press releases to portray them as a technologically sophisicated competitor, Mollusk realized the low-effort solution was suited to Mega Motors.

Mollusk recommended an aggressive accentuation of Mega Motors incompetence. A press conference at which the CEO responed to a question about liquidity with an irrelevant crying confession to a love affair with a family pet, and the spectacularly fatal results of "Pure Grain Alcohol Fridays" at the Milwauakee assembly facility cemented the firm's reputation as hopeless losers.

This strategy successfully convinced creditors to accept radically reduced payments to settle debt, forced union concessions, and convinced local, state, and federal governments to begin a variety of bailout programs to prevent the imminent loss of tens of thousands of jobs.

The quick thinking on the part of a Mollusk Marketing Account Counselor brought in enough government money to prevent the tedious redesign of Mega Motors aging and inefficient line of vehicles.

Motivational Thought of the Day:

"To be positive: To be mistaken at the top of one's voice."

-Ambrose Bierce